Friday, August 19, 2011

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell Suspends Ed Bouchette for being too "Snarky"

In an unprecedented move, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell suspended Pittsburgh Post-Gazette Steelers beat writer Ed Bouchette for 5 games, saying that Bouchette's writing and web chats were too snarky for his taste.  "I am the defender of the (NFL) shield and I must make decisions that may be unpopular at times.  Ed Bouchette was warned that his sarcasm was way over the line, just like when James Harrison touches a quarterback."  Bouchette declined to comment in depth saying simply that he would consider appealing the ruling. 
This announcement comes on the heels of former Ohio State quarterback Terrell Pryor's 5 game suspension before he even becomes part of the league.  Pryor is considering an appeal of his own.  Sources in the NFL offices on Park Avenue in New York City have said that Commissioner Goodell almost suspended the United States Congress after the recent budget battle looked to be at an impasse.  At the time, Goodell had his own impasse with the NFL lockout and decided to concentrate on completing that deal first.  Rumors circulated late Friday that Goodell might take on world leaders but that could not be confirmed before this story was released.

NOTE: This is an article written for humorous purposes only.  Mr. Bouchette has not been suspended and there are no known conflicts between the NFL and the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.
Picture courtesy of the Detroit News

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